Showing posts with label me. Show all posts
Showing posts with label me. Show all posts

August 31, 2017

25.



Quarter of a century and counting! I am so grateful to have made it around the sun, my ruling planet, 25 times. 25 years of beautiful brown skin, in possession of my grandfather’s eyes, my grandmother’s smile and loving spirit, and all of my hopes and dreams. I’m so happy to still be here. I’m still here…still breathing, still learning, still loving, still smiling—sometimes too much but that’s okay—still crying, like all the time and that’s okay too. These eyes and smile that I love so much are not just for show. They often tell my secrets and display my emotions. I’m happy to still be here and able to learn, everyday, more about my emotions and to listen to what my emotions are telling me. So emotions and all, I’m welcoming this new year and am prepared for the blessings and lessons that are in store for me.

I acknowledge and celebrate the accomplishments I’ve made over the past year, like earning my Masters and recommitting to while also being consistent with how I love and take care of myself. The past year also taught me a lot and lessons, some painful and some funny, have been useful. I learned more over the past year about loss, letting go, healing and recovery. In this new year I’m continuing to welcome lessons, continued growth, and unapologetic self-love.

I’m on a mission to become more in harmony with my spirit. For me, this looks like learning more about my emotions and paying attention to them. Becoming more in harmony with my spirit has been calling for me to be more mindful and pay attention to what’s coming up in my life. I’m focusing more on connecting with the universe and with my higher self. I am paying attention. I’m listening. I’m listening to the universe, to my body, and to my mind. I feel like this new year calls for being mindful, living in the moment, and being grateful. I’m getting better at the way I practice gratitude. I need to be more consistent in my practice of gratitude. When I do practice gratitude, I tend to feel more at peace and I honestly feel softer and more open. I’d like to feel that more often.

This year I am nicer to myself. I believe in myself. I love myself and others. I am open and listening. I welcome new challenges. My heart is filled with love and understanding. I am deserving. I am soft. I am strong. I am loving. I am grateful. I am complicated and complex. I am enough and I deserve to be here.



“A woman in harmony with her spirit is like a river flowing. She goes where she will without pretense and arrives at her destination to be prepared to be herself and only herself.”
-Maya Angelou

October 7, 2014

Celebrating Me: October 6th and 7th.

I'm sitting at work today helping my students with their homework yesterday and I realize that today is the 7th and I did not take my selfie yesterday! I remember telling myself last week to remind myself but apparently, I forgot to remind myself. I took a selfie today and I also have one from the 5th.



Yesterday was a pretty good day. I'm upset I forgot about my selfie. I didn't get as much done as I had hoped but my class went well Monday morning and I went out for drinks after work. My pina colada was very yummy! I also got a lot of sleep which is something I forgot to do all weekend because of a paper that was due Sunday night.

Today was not as great. My students were stressing me out today. I missed the bus by a minute and it threw my whole day off. I'm upset with myself because I still haven't cleaned my room nor have I done my laundry and those tasks were on my to-do list this past weekend. So today, I felt silenced, frustrated, and stressed out. On another note, I'm enjoying this fall weather that is finally here. I'm happy for boots, scarves, and cardigans!

My goals for this month are to stay focused! I need to stay on top of things, not only blogging but my school work and my work as well. Lastly, I need to not let it upset me when people talk over me or try to silence me when they are wrong and strong. I know what's right in my heart and I shouldn't let it get me upset.

Lastly, I'm growing stronger every day. I can only be me. There's only one me and I dedicate my time and my life to being good to myself in any way possible. Love yourself every single day because no matter what anyone else says, you deserve that love.

PS. I'm short, fat, and proud of that.



August 7, 2014

Celebrating Me: August 6th/7th

August Selfie = Birthday Selfie!!


I'm 22 years old! I really tried to post on my birthday but I got in after midnight and went straight to bed. So my selfie post is a day late but who says celebrations have to end?

I did the very stereotypical playing of Taylor Swift's 22 as I got ready for work. I actually only heard it once before on the day before my birthday because I wanted to see if I liked it before I made it the first song I listened to on my birthday. It is a very cute song and I'm glad one of my best friends, Mia, reminded me about it.

I started the self care presents by treating myself to a delicious bodega breakfast sandwich with a cup of coffee. Then I went to work and I made sure that I had on the beautiful skirt that I got for my birthday. I wore it all day even though I had time to change before going out after work but I wanted to feel special and it's my special day to celebrate me so I really tried not to feel guilty about anything."Treat yo self."

I got so many wonderful birthday wishes. Some of the students even sang happy birthday to me. It was great and so cute!! After work, I went out with my momma and two of my aunts to dinner and a movie all of which was wonderful as well. I think I fell asleep in the car on the way home. I was so tired. This was my birthday outfit.


Overall, I had a phenomenal birthday. I was a little apprehensive at first about working on my birthday but I'm glad I went to work. All the beautiful faces I got to see at work and the well wishes made my day so much more special. 22 feels different. I can't really explain it. I looked in the mirror after I woke up and I felt that I looked different--older. However, I'm not sure if I trust what my mind is really thinking at 5 in the morning. 

Most importantly, on my birthday I was in love with the skin I'm in. 
I'm happy to be here and to be alive.
21 brought me graduation, my Bachelor's degree and a move to New York.
I'm thankful for another year of life. I'm excited to see what 22 will bring!



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Post birthday(today):

Today was an okay day. I was so tired from the night before and I think my lack of sleep gave me a headache that is only just now going away. Besides the headache and some overwhelming moments at work today, I had a good day. I'm happy that tomorrow is finally Friday. The weekend is near!

I've been  reading Pearl Cleage's latest book and I really can't put it down. I love it so far. There was something she wrote about writing and how creativity and laziness really battle it out all of the time. I strongly identified with that entire page. I'll write more about the book when I finish it. Every page is another piece of her life and that's just so cool to me!

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Leaving you with a special quote. I hope you have an amazing and safe weekend!!



July 6, 2014

Celebrating Me: July 6th


I am so proud of myself today. I was very productive. I cleaned my room. Did laundry.  Moisturized my hair and put my mini twists in flexirods (see scarf). Washed my sister's hair. Got my lunch ready for tomorrow. Refilled my metrocard. It was a good day. I did everything I set out to do this weekend. However, I planned to go to be at 10 and as I type this it is 10:04 so that didn't work out but it's okay. My bed isn't going anywhere and in the morning there will be coffee.

My job has transitioned from afterschool to summer camp so now my work day starts at 8. I secretly love mornings. I like sleeping in too but I really don't mind if I have to get up early. I think mornings are wonderful. A lot of times they're quiet. There's coffee and breakfast food!! It's usually cooler in the morning time. I'm a fan of mornings. To make my morning go smoothly, I do as much as I can the night before. I even instagrammed a little video of me making my salad and iced coffee. See it here.

Today, I'm so thankful for my family and all of the time I get to spend with them.

My selfie day today reminds me that my birthday is one month away! It also reminds me that half of the year has already flown by. I'm not sure about you but it feels like this year is going by so quickly! I'm honestly ready for the cold months to come back.

I'm currently reading The Other Side of Paradise by Staceyann Chin. I really love it. I'm almost finished. Finishing books can be so bittersweet sometimes. I'm really enjoying reading this story. With it being summer time, I've been seeing a lot of summer reading lists and my book wishlist is just getting longer and longer. I'm going to be excited to finish this book and then sad that it's over but then excited to start the next book. I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to read next but I have plenty of good titles to choose from.

My productive day has left me tired but feeling accomplished. This heat has me miserable but I'm about to go moisturize with some lavender oil and drink some refreshing ice cold water.

Today, only after a refreshing and exfoliating shower, I felt wonderful and calm in my own skin. I'm happy to be where I am today and I'm excited to see what this month beings. 

June 6, 2014

Celebrating Me: June 6th



This has been a long week and that ponytail has been working hard! Today was Friday and I was looking forward to it all week! It's the end of a tough week and Orange is the New Black season two came out today! My hair desperately needs to be washed and I'm glad the weekend is here so that I can tend to my hair. I had a pretty good day at work today even though I just wanted to stay at home curled up in my bed.

I'm thankful for all of the people in my life and I'm thankful for my job. In the last month I have had a lot of Dunkin Donuts coffee so I think I should say that I'm thankful for that too.

Last week I bought a bunch of Shea Moisture because it was on sale and I have so many new favorite products. They smell so good and they're good for my hair and skin. Shopping, self care, skin and hair loving all wrapped up in one BOGO event. Love it!

I'm really looking forward to just laying in bed curled up with my laptop. I think I really just need some time to relax so I think I'll spend my Saturday night doing just that. That's the plan, anyway.

I also really want to see the Fault in Our Stars movie. I read the book and absolutely loved it so I can't wait to see it on the big screen. I've spoken with a few people who have seen it already and they all loved it!

Well, it's Friday night and my bed has been calling me since I got out of it this morning! If you're reading this, I hope you have a wonderful weekend!

May 6, 2014

Celebrating Me: May 6th


Today I'm finally starting to feel like I'm connected to Spring. I took a long walk today and it actually felt great. Between work and my walk, I spent a lot of time outside today and it was very nice. However my feet hurt from standing up all day.

I'm also so glad that I'm finally feeling better. Up until about three days ago I still couldn't stomach real food. My life was tea, toast, crackers, and bananas. I think I'm back to normal now. I really missed normal foods.

I'm so sleepy today. I stayed up late last night playing the sims knowing that I had to wake up to go in to work early for a staff meeting. It's okay because I can sleep in tomorrow!

I feel so comfortable because I redecorated my room this past weekend. I'm now surrounded in a room full of purples and other pastel spring colors and I love it!

I'm currently, in this moment, excited for the mini Grey's Anatomy Marathon I'm going to have while I play the sims.

Lastly, I'm still slightly crying with happiness and joy for all of my friends who graduated within the past week! The world just welcomed some very beautiful college graduates!


Quote of the day:
 Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.
-Maya Angelou






I hope you  enjoy the rest of your week! ♥ 

 

December 20, 2013

Graduation: December 14, 2013!!

I have some great news! Ready? I am a college graduate!! On the morning of December 14, 2013, I walked across that stage and it symbolized that I've earned my degree! Finally!! It feels so good. I'm so glad that I was able to share that day with some of the most important people in my life.

Sometimes it's hard to believe that I'm done with undergrad. I made it! There were so many times when I wasn't sure if I would ever finish. But I made it. I changed my major a bunch of times, wanted to quit, wanted to transfer, and just give up. Some times it was hard to keep going but I knew that there was a finish line and the only way to get to it was to keep on keeping on. I really made it and this was a day I'll never forget.

I chose the quote "Still I Rise" for my graduation quote because I love the poem and I love Maya Angelou. I really wanted my cap to be a representation of myself. That's why I added the bow as well. I love quotes and I wanted to make sure I used a quote that fit how I was feeling. I'm so happy that I chose this one. It means so much to me.



I've grown so much and I've learned so much about myself and about life during my 3.5 years in school. This chapter of my life is over. It's a little scary but it's also exciting. College brought me so much. So many wonderful people have entered my life and my heart. I have memories and moments that no one can take away from me. I've learned how to take care of myself and how to make me happy. Although there were hard times, I've learned to love myself more and more each day. I'm so thankful for everyone who made my time there so special. I'm also thankful for the people who didn't always make me feel the best because often times, they made me realize that self care and my safe spaces are important. Everyone enters your life for a reason! I have no doubts about that.

I can't wait to see what life brings me next!




December 17, 2012

Days 16 and 17

Your outfit of the day:

I was in a car all day yesterday traveling. I was in a t-shirt and sweats and I didn't take a picture. However, I have a picture of me in "Christmas" colors. 






Something stripped

I wore this stripped shirt to an office Holiday party a few days ago.

Also, here is a picture of the candy cane I just gave my cousin.


April 5, 2010

list of some things that I believe to be true..

  • Peace is possible. It's just going to be really hard to achieve.
  • Smile are beautiful and precious and wonderful.
  • being true to yourself can be hard sometimes but it's pretty awesome
  • love knows no barriers. at least it shouldn't. I'm not talking about let's get married love though. I'm talking about I care for you and you care for me, I respect you and you respect me, I won't harm you with words from my mouth...etc. hopefully you get it! =]
  • Watching kids cartoons, the good ones, really calm me down. The ones like Arthur, Rugrats, the Smurfs, the magic school bus, recess, the little mermaid, stuff like that.
  • One day our wishes will come true, the safe ones that won't get anyone in jail unlike my wish to kidnap Rupert Grint which I won't ever pursue because I'll end up in jail and then on the news all over the world...it's just too much work
  • Good friends are hard to find. That's probably why they give the best hugs and have the best smiles and are just filled with awesome.
  • some guys let me down but I learn from them and I guess it's a good thing that they treat me bad because it's a lesson. a valuable life lesson.... [-_-]
  • you cannot shame someone into becoming someone they're not. It won't work.
  • working out is fun
  • coloring is fun
  • baking is fun
  • I can love me some me and some days I don't and I'm okay with that.
  • Hope is wonderful
  • Peace is possible ♥

January 28, 2010

Faith and Who I Am.


I love Jesus. I love God. I love the relationship that we have. His love is carved into my heart. I love having faith. It makes my days brighter and my smiles more meaningful. You can tease me or say harsh things about my religion but It's a part of me and it's a part of my life. Nothing can change that. I'm not the kind of person who thinks that my religion is better than others. What people believe in their heart is what they should live to. It's a part of what we are. Don't be afraid to be you. You're amazing. Embrace it. Don't shy away from the amazing opportunity that comes from being true to yourself. Most of my days are fun because I enjoy the person that I am. Sometimes, I make myself smile. Sometimes, I make myself cry. It gets hard sometimes but it's worth it. I get to learn about myself, my likes, my dislikes and everything that makes me unique and makes me who I am. I'm still learning and I love it!


Who Am I? Well so far, this is what I've got, I'm a girl...
  • who loves laughing
  • and love smiles
  • loves seeing people happy
  • who is smart
  • loves to read
  • loves music, especially music from the 60's to the 80's
  • love her family and friends
  • wants to be a psychiatrist
  • wants to change the world
  • loves to learn about other places in the world and their cultures
  • is learning Arabic and Spanish
  • loves cold weather
  • loves the rain
  • loves to see children laugh and smile
  • is amazed by her mother
  • believes that everyone is beautiful
  • believes that every heart will one day be mended
  • who love God and loves talking to God
  • who loves zebras
  • who loves polka dots
  • who loves watching Arthur and the Golden Girls
  • who loves the adrenline rush of the emergency room
  • who loves bright colors
  • who loves flowers
  • who loves to sing at the top of her lungs when everyone in the house is asleep
  • who loves chocolate chip cookies
  • who loves baking
  • who loves salmon
  • who loves sweet tea'
  • who dislikes hate, anger, war
  • who used to be depressed
  • who takes an antidepressant...woo lexapro!!
  • who used to cut
  • who likes to draw hearts, stars, and flowers everywhere
  • who loves writing her name
  • who loves writing
  • who loves seeing her mommy smile
  • who loves her little brother and sister
  • who loves teddy bears and stuffed animals
  • who loves grey's anatomy
  • who loves ballet flats
  • who loves shopping
  • who loves crying
  • who loves thinking
  • who loves the Jonas brothers and their smiles, hearts, and music
  • who loves george clooney, ricky gervais, idris elba, john mayer, michael cera, rupert grint, and leonardo dicaprio
  • who still loves Chris Brown
  • who loves earth, wind, and fire :)
  • who loves going to concerts
  • who wants to travel the world and see all the beautiful sights and people.
  • who loves yoga and exercise
  • who loves to dance around her room in the morning if she has enough time to
  • who loves helping people
  • who loves her best friends
  • who love talking to her friends outside by a fire in cold weather.
  • who loves herself on most days
  • who is normal but tries to be the best Kiyanna Shanay that their is.
  • who is happy to report that she now knows 6 arabic words :)