The MONSTER -_-

I've been facing a monster for a while now. I let it attack me because I didn't know how to deal with it. I let it attack me. I allowed myself to believe it when he told me I was the person I am because of him. I let this monster tell me that the things I believed in were stupid and weren't important to anyone else. I let this monster insult my intelligence. I ignored this monster's stand for inequality and just let things go on because I was afraid. Because even though this person hurting me is a monster, I didn't want to hurt them. I feared the reaction that I might have recieved if I told him my true feelings. I was afraid that he would just treat me worse and I thought I didn't have the self-esteem to deal with it.

I refuse to take the criticism. I refuse to let him put me down anymore and then blame everyone else for the way I treat him when the way I treat him is the result of the way he puts me down and talks to me like I don't have any feelings. It's all been so much to handle and worry about but I've recently realized that I'm so much more smarter than this monster. For one, I don't treat people the way he does. I would never treat a part of me the way he treats me. It just isn't right. I would never insult anyone's intelligence the way he insults mine. It won't make me a better person if I put everyone else beneath me so why should I keep ignoring it when he does it. I won't stand for it anymore. I'm letting this monster know that he cannot harm me anymore. I'm not going to let him bring me down anymore because I've realized that monsters don't think the way humans do and letting him get to me is just stupid. I know that I'm pretty okay person and not because I'm his child. I don't get good grades just because I'm his child and I'm not mature for my age because I'm his child like he says. I am who I am because, just like everyone else, I see the world through my own eyes and deal with it the way I think it should be dealt and not by following what others tell me. I'm not going to let him ruin me ever again....

I'm learning to love myself and I will not let this monster get in the way of that ever.